A Girl Potato and Boy Potato had eyes for each other, and finally, they got married and had a little sweet potato, which they called ‘Yam.’
Of course, they wanted the best for Yam. When it was time, they told her about the facts of life.
They warned her about going out and getting half-baked, so she wouldn’t get accidentally mashed, get a bad name for herself like ‘Hot Potato,’ and end up with many Tater Tots.
Yam said she would stay on the straight and narrow and wouldn’t associate with those high-class Yukon Golds, or the ones from the other side of the tracks who advertise their trade on all the trucks that say, ‘Frito Lay.’
Mr. and Mrs. Potato sent Yam to Idaho P.U. (Potato University ) so that she’d really be in the Chips when she graduated.
But despite all they did for her, one-day Yam came home and announced she was going to marry Tom Brokaw.
Tom Brokaw!
Mr. and Mrs. Potato were very upset.
They told Yam she couldn’t possibly marry Tom Brokaw
Because he’s just……A COMMONTATER
How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?
Why do you have to “put your two cents in”… but it’s only a “penny for your thoughts”? Where’s that extra penny going? (taxes)
What disease did cured ham actually have?
Why is it that people say they “slept like a baby” when babies wake up like every two hours?
If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?
Why are you IN a movie, but you’re ON TV?
- I can totally keep secrets. It’s the people I tell them to that can’t.
- If I promise to miss you, will you go away?
- It takes patience to listen.. it takes skill to pretend you’re listening.
- Remember, everyone seems normal until you get to know them…
Some Interesting Tweets
Parenting isn’t really a test, it’s more an unrelenting series of pop quizzes that you had no clue were coming and are in no way prepared for.
When my watch tells me to stand up and move for one minute, I typically end up in a location that has chocolate
I built the kids a fort with our Amazon boxes. It has two bathrooms and a study.
A duck walks into a bar and asks the bartender, “Do you have duck food here?” The bartender says no and the duck leaves. The next day, the same thing happens. The duck wanders in and asks, “Do you have any duck food?” Once again, the nonplussed bartender says no and the duck leaves. On the third day, the duck enters the bar and the bartender asks, “What do you want this time?” The duck asks once more, “Do you have any duck food?” “No!” yells the bartender. “We don’t have any duck food. If you come back and ask me again, I’ll nail your feet to the floor!” The duck leaves and comes back the next day and asks, “Do you have any nails?” The bartender says, “No.” The duck then asks, “Do you have any duck food?”
Some Quotes
The science of today is the technology of tomorrow.
– Edward Teller
We live in a society exquisitely dependent on science and technology, in which hardly anyone knows anything about science and technology.
– Carl Sagan
“Light thinks it travels faster than anything, but it is wrong. No matter how fast light travels, it finds the darkness has always got there first, and is waiting for it.”
― Terry Pratchett, Reaper Man
What also appears to be true is that a lie travels much faster than the truth.
“A lie can travel halfway around the world while the truth is putting on its shoes.”
― Mark Twain (or maybe from Jonathan Swift? It has also been attributed to Winston Churchill)
In the last few years, we have learned the power of social media and how it can make us believe the craziest things. Of course, this not a new phenomenon. It has been happening forever. Here are some more quotes regarding truth and lies
“Each man speaks and acts and lives according to his character. Falsehood is mean and culpable, and truth is noble and worthy of praise. The man who is truthful where nothing is at stake will be still more truthful where something is at stake.”
– Aristotle
“If you tell a big enough lie and tell it frequently enough, it will be believed.”
― adolf hitler
“In a time of deceit, telling the truth is a revolutionary act.”
― George Orwell
I hope you enjoyed these jokes and cartoons. If you have any good ones, please send them to me.
Regarding all these jokes and cartoons, no copyright infringement is intended. The content is only for your enjoyment.