Elderly Friends got together for a regular poker game night.
During a break between rounds, one friend tells the other:
HEY JIM, YOUR MEMORY SKILLS GOT SHARPER. WHAT MEDS ARE YOU TAKING?
Continue reading “Technical Jokes and Cartoons – 118”
“Did you hear about the man who invented the shovel? Some say he had a ground-breaking invention.”
Continue reading “Technical Jokes and Cartoons – 117”
A crow was sitting in a tree whistling a tune… A small rabbit saw the crow, and asked him, “Can I also sit like you and do nothing all day long?”
The crow answered “Sure, why not.”
So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the crow, and rested. Suddenly, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it.
Moral of the story:
To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very, very high up.
A guy goes to the doctor with a severe upset stomach. The doctor diagnoses a tapeworm, but says “not to worry”, he’s got a surefire cure.
“Okay!” Says the guy, “When can you start? I can’t stand the thought of a tapeworm in me.”
Continue reading “Technical Jokes and Cartoons – 115”
Sam died and left $50,000 in his will for an elaborate funeral.
As the last attenders left, Sam’s wife, Rose, turned to her oldest friend, Sadie, and said: “Well, I’m sure Sam would be pleased.” “I’m sure you’re right” replied Sadie, who leaned in close and lowered her voice to a whisper: “tell me, how much did it really cost?” “All of it” said Rose. “50,000.” “No!” Sadie exclaimed.”
I mean, it was very nice, but really…….$50,000?” Rose nodded. “The funeral was $6500. I donated $500 to the synagogue. The food and drinks for another $500. And the rest went towards the memorial stone.”
I picked up a hitchhiker last night. He asked, how do you know I’m not a serial killer?
I replied, “The chances of two serial killers in one car are astronomical.”
‘Big John’ rides into town. He ties his horse up outside the saloon, fires six rounds into the air, boots the doors almost off their hinges, and in he goes.
Continue reading “Technical Jokes and Cartoons – 112”
Paddy says to Mick,
–I found this pen,
is it yours?
Mick replies:
–Don’t know, give it here.
He then tries it and says,
–Yes, it is!
Paddy asks:
–How do you know?
Mick replies:
–That’s my handwriting!
Continue reading “Technical Jokes and Cartoons – 111”
A Lawyer named ‘Strange‘ died and his wife asked the grave builder to inscribe on his grave:-
“Here lies Strange, an honest man, and a lawyer.”
There was a poor old Irish cobbler whose shop was next door to a very upscale French restaurant.
Every day at lunchtime, Mike, the Irish gent, would go out the back of his shop and eat his soda bread and maybe a kipper or piece of Irish blue cheese while smelling the wonderful odors coming from the restaurant’s kitchen.
One morning, the Irishman was surprised to receive an invoice in the mail from the adjoining restaurant for “enjoyment of food.”
Continue reading “Technical Jokes and Cartoons – 109”