“Poor Old fool,” thought the well-dressed gentleman as he watched an old man fish in a puddle outside a pub. So, he invited the older man inside for a drink. As they sipped their whiskeys, the gentleman thought he’d humor the old man and asked, “So how many have you caught today?”
The old man replied, “You are the eighth.”
Two fleas were walking out of a bar when they discovered it was raining.
One turned to the other and asked – Shall we walk or take a dog?
A panda walks into a bar. He orders a sandwich, eats it, then draws a gun and fires two shots in the air. “Why? Why are you behaving in this strange, un-panda-like fashion?” asks the confused waiter as the panda walks towards the exit. The panda produces a wildlife manual and tosses it over his shoulder. “I’m a panda,” he says at the door. “Look it up.” The waiter turns to the relevant entry and, sure enough, finds an explanation. “Panda: Large black-and-white bear-like mammal, native to China. Eats, shoots, and leaves.”
An older woman went to a walk-in clinic where a young, new doctor saw her.
After about 3 minutes in the exam room, the doctor told her she was pregnant. She burst out the door, screaming as she ran down the hall.
An older doctor stopped her and asked her what the problem was.
After she told him what had happened, he sat her down in another exam room and marched back to the first doctor.
‘What is the matter with you? That lady is over 60 years old, has four grown children and several grandchildren! And you told her she was pregnant?! Are you insane?!’
After all the background checks, interviews and testing were done, there were 3 finalists: two men and a woman.
For the final test, the FBI agents took one of the men to a large metal door and handed him a gun.
“We must know that you will follow your instructions no matter what the circumstances. Inside the room, you find your wife sitting in a chair… Kill her!!”
The man said, “You can’t be serious. I could never shoot my wife.”
