Tag: tech jokes

Jack made his way through veterinary school working nights as a taxidermist.

Upon graduation, he decided he could combine his two vocations to better serve the needs of his patients and their owners, while doubling his practice and, therefore, his income.

He opened his own offices with a shingle on the door saying, “Dr. Jones, Veterinary Medicine and Taxidermy – Either way, you get your dog back!”

Here are some silly puns and jokes.

• An invisible man marries an invisible woman. The kids were nothing to look at either.
• Deja Moo: The feeling that you’ve heard this bull before.
• A man takes his Rottweiler to the vet and says, “My dog’s cross-eyed, is there anything you can do for him?” “Well,” says the vet, “let’s have a look at him.” So he picks the dog up and examines his eyes, then checks his teeth. Finally, he says, “I’m going to have to put him down.” “What? Because he’s cross-eyed?” “No, because he’s really heavy.”

Here are some things to think about:

There are so many different kinds of apples, that if you ate a new one every day, it would take over 20 years to try them all.

Our brain uses the same amount of power as a 10-watt light bulb.

Sometimes I pretend to be normal, but it gets boring… so I go back to being me.

Observations from Children

On the first day of school, a first-grader handed his teacher a note from his mother.  The note read, ‘The opinions expressed by this child are not necessarily those of his parents’.

A woman was trying hard to get the ketchup out of the bottle.  During her struggle the phone rang so she asked her 4-year-old daughter to answer the phone.  ‘Mommy can’t come to the phone to talk to you right now.  She’s hitting the bottle.’

A little boy got lost at the YMCA and found himself in the women’s locker room.  When he was spotted, the room burst into shrieks, with ladies grabbing towels and running for cover.  The little boy watched in amazement and then asked, ‘What’s the matter, haven’t you ever seen a little boy before?’